"Va ya Con Dios"

My recent health scare (I’m okay)  got me to realizing just how little I have seen my son over the last 5 years.  Robert Herrick the 17^th Century English poet wrote those famous lines (thanks to the movie “Dead Poets Society”)

GATHER ye rosebuds while ye may,
Old Time is still a-flying:
And this same flower that smiles to-day
To-morrow will be dying.

He was encouraging young women (virgins) to give up their pursuit of chastity in favor of FUN, ROMANCE, and ADVENTURE. Clearly a scandalous poem in his day it has come to have a slightly different meaning today. Today we needn’t fear too many virgins floating around in pursuit of chastity.

The meaning today is doing what you want/need to do right now. The longer you wait, the greater your chance for not doing it at all. We live in a society that promotes waiting.  Retirement is a waiting game, social security is a waiting game, and whole life insurance pays off the most at the end of your life. Wait in lines, wait for love, and wait to have kids, wait for that promotion at work, and wait to get married, wait, wait, and wait. Then one day something happens and what was the point of waiting?

Should “fools” rush in? Should we act on every impulse? Of course not, maybe if you do wait till the end of the calendar year you will get a much better deal on a car or furniture and maybe waiting to make sure Mr. Bachelorette isn’t a frigging nightmare is a good idea. But something’s should NOT be put off. Hugging your kids today or your parents if you can, telling that loved one how special they are or even going to spend time with your son on the east coast. I retired two years ago, and here I sit waiting to go spend time with him. He left 5 years ago, I've seen him 1.9% of all the 1,835 days since.

The bloom does fade quickly from the rose. You have your opportunities and you need to act. So Wednesday of this week, my Acura (God willing) will pull away from the curb with me at the wheel and I will “Vaya con dios”.

Do I want to leave the incredible weather of San Diego? NO Do I want to miss my friends? NO Do I want to, or can I afford to wait any longer to get the next phase of my life going? NO I have no illusions that it will be all wonderful, that’s the good part about living longer you know all happiness and unhappiness is on a sliding scale. Life is almost always “more or less”.

Well, The Bailey Post will continue no matter what the zip code and my e-mail addresses remain the same as does my phone number. Staying in touch is pretty easy these days and I plan to be back here at the very least early 2013. This will be my last “personal” entry for a while. My blog (as most of you know) is about current events and the crazy side of life. I am backlogged on those stories so my next one will be more about what it is about our world that makes us grind our teeth at night. You've all been terrific and moving on isn't easy but I need to

Gather my rosebuds while I may.

"Will, the Cautionary Tale"

Most of you know that I had a serious health scare recently. I found out on August 7 that I did not have prostate cancer. I can assure you that my doctor believed I did, absolutely, and I believed it because he believed it. I did know there were also extenuating circumstances specific to me that he seemed unwillingly and uninterested in hearing about. It was all about the numbers to him. The numbers don’t lie. But in my case the numbers didn’t add up to cancer. I do not want to go through my case with point by point details but rather focus on the bigger message about how important trusting your own instincts are about you and your health and to always, always get second opinions if you believe the doctor’s diagnosis doesn’t seem quite right.

In fall 2001, I got a urinary tract infection. I am certain that is what I had and I went to my doctor for antibiotics but he told me, men don’t get UTI’s much at all and instead sent me home to drink cranberry juice. I left thinking, “I don't think he got this right” but I was raised to believe doctors know what’s best for you. If your doctor says drink cranberry juice you just go hone and drink cranberry juice. I didn’t get a second opinion; I didn’t get any antibiotics. 4 months later my PSA number (a number that indicates prostate health) had risen out of the normal range and I immediately went off to my first Urologist. He was a cool guy and told me that usually the number rises if you have prostatitis (think of tendinitis of the prostate). A biopsy and thorough examination of my whole system later he told me I had had a serious UTI that went untreated and had damaged my prostate.  In fact he said it was so bad it atrophied 2 smaller (less necessary) glands. I should have gotten a second opinion. I needed the antibiotics.

I eventually fought off the infection but not the lasting effects.

Over the next 10 years I have had (2 more urologists) an MRI, 2 more extensive biopsies and more scary days thinking I had cancer than you can shake a stick at. By my count I have been stabbed by a biopsy needle 56 times in total and had a metal tube shoved up over my prostate for the MRI. The diagnostic testing has caused more disruption to my prostate than my prostatitis. They have no idea how to prevent the prostate from being inflamed. There appears to be no cure. Some people get this and some do not. My latest round of scary days lasted 45 days since I had to wait my turn for the MRI, the biopsy and the results. My doctor (I call him Dr. Alarmist) was distinctly not comforting. I am a professional worrier so you can imagine what even 24 hours was like for me.

I asked my doctor if he would just take the damn gland out and he said no. They won’t take it out unless it has cancer. This EVEN though once you get past 60 the gland is relatively worthless to a man. Its only purpose is fertility. It controls erections but more importantly keeps sperm alive for 72 hours so you can procreate. If you don’t plan on having kids after 60 and you are the least bit creative a man doesn’t need it at all. Post 60, the prostate can cause you major distress, freak out Urologists, and maybe even kill you but you don’t need it and they won’t take it out. Go figure.

My point is this, had I gotten a second opinion, trusted me to know my body more that Dr. Strange- love, I would have gotten the antibiotics I needed and treated my urinary tract infection then. Chances are I would have been able to avoid all this unbelievable aggravation both to my prostate and my psyche.  Please, please get annual physicals and check out every area that could cause aggravation. Don’t let doctor’s scare the shit out of you, I did and it caused me a lot of sleepless nights. Above all else know you, if you think you have something (you see clear indicators like I did with the UTI) then get another opinion. 56 needle stabs later, and the equivalent of 14 weeks’ worth of sleepless, anxious nights I sure wish I had!!! 

"BP is Baaack"

As some of you know, I had a recent health scare that took almost all my energy and concentration in recent weeks. A future blog will be written on the importance of (medical) second opinions. For now I can report I had a good result on my lab tests and so I say to you with happiness: “I’m baaack”

The Olympics

Opening and closing ceremonies took forever and were what I imagine being on LSD is like. The English are eccentric and these ceremonies certainly proved that. I wish the front page of the Union Tribune wouldn’t have had the medals count. Like a score card it lets us know how many medals we won versus say China and Russia. Of course we ended up with the most medals but what if we hadn’t? What then? Panic in the streets? Super PAC funding for the next Olympics? Perhaps we would have had a collective national depression. Must it always be about winning? Is that even the Olympic spirit?

Ever notice athletes win gold medals, settle for silver and are lucky to get the bronze. Finish fourth or below and well you got a nice trip and some cool clothes but you aren’t a winner. The fourth place finisher could mop up the streets with any of us but they slink home having to wear the mantle of “what happened”? I don’t like that part of the games.

Paul Ryan

Finally Mitt chooses. I would have thought Marco Rubio from Florida would have made a better choice for obvious reasons but maybe he didn’t want it. Ryan appeals to the more right wing of the Republican Party, and he has authored an economic plan. Plus he is younger at 41 years of age. He’ll be good on the campaign trail and he’ll bolster the idea the Mitt is the choice if you want the economy fixed. Still and all it’s still an old white man running with young a white man. I think it means that Mitt is all in on the economy. He is going to make the economy the biggest and only topic. That may work since the economy still sucks and Obama doesn’t have much of a plan beyond telling us he has a plan, that and to just trust him. But if other issues come up like: Afghanistan, illegal immigration, and social issues like abortion or gay marriage these two could be hurting. Ryan won’t hurt Romney like Palin hurt McCain but will he be enough to bring it home?

California Tax Bill in November

The Guv’ has made it clear to Californians that if they don’t vote to approve his request for some higher taxes this November it’s going to be a Grapes of Wrath type disaster. Of course the schools will take it on the chin. Immediately San Diego City Schools have said they will cut back to 160 teaching days (from the current 170 already which is already down from the high of 177 a few years ago). So parents either raise your own taxes or make plans to have your kids at home 202 days a year. That ought to scare the shit out of the adult voters.  There will be cut backs with cops and fire department personnel as well. As the Guv’ puts it, either vote for this tax increase or watch your home potentially burn to the ground, or maybe no cops to protect the kids that are out on the street with so much time on their hands. Of course the politicians wouldn’t think of not spending oodles of money on illegal alien kids in schools, or maybe get rid of the stupid and incredibly costly state testing which most teachers believe is only PR driven and a waste of time. Nope, we’ll keep the tests and get rid of the teachers, teaching days, cops and fire fighters. Brilliant!!

Betrayal

Recently a high ranking Army Officer and 2 aides met with local Afghan officials to discuss transition and other local issues. After they finished supping together the Afghani stood up, withdrew his weapon and shot all three servicemen to death. It illustrates for me yet again the basic principle that our country (I speak of our military non-leadership and politicians) refuses to learn. Many countries’ want us to take care of their immediate problems (Usually a thug in charge) but they really don’t like us in their country. The longer we stay the more the locals (the ones that once welcomed us) turn on our servicemen. Do you know how many servicemen have been killed by Afghani’s dressed in Afghan police uniforms or invite our servicemen to dine with them and then blow them up? Countless numbers and more every week. This happened in Iraq, Vietnam, and Korea. The point is they don’t want our religion, our “superiority”, our western ways or our “democracy”. Thank you for getting rid of our latest bad guy now get the fuck out seems to be the operative thought process. When we don’t (get out) they start killing us. This happens over and over and over again. Stupid is as stupid does!!