"NYC not Oz"

When I moved to NYC in October and especially when I began to send pictures back of NYC quite a few people I know “back there” text-ed or e-mailed me that they were envious or jealous of my being here. It made me sad for several reasons; number one I know that feeling (envious), know it as if it were a life-long friend. When Austin sent me pictures of New York I was envious of him being there. When my friends went to Tahoe, Hawaii, or on cross country trips I was envious of that. The second reason was because I realized I was only sending back the best of NYC BUT not everything about NYC. Running across The Brooklyn Bridge (cool) running in Central Park (cool) and seeing iconic locations also cool but they aren't the whole story. Try and imagine The Wizard of Oz without the Wicked Witch or the flying monkeys, hardly the same. There are days when I feel  lucky to be here, but the key is those are some days not every day.

Let me now tell you about what there is here not be jealous or envious of.

It’s Small

Everything in this city (except the buildings and bridges) is small, really small.  Apartments (unless you are rich and I mean rich) are small, small, small. If you have a studio you are living in 300-400 square feet.  One bedroom(s) are maybe 700 square feet. You have kitchens and pantries that are bigger than my place. The kitchens (here) are smaller than your bathroom, I guarantee it. The restaurants are small, bars are small, and offices are small. The local UPS office is the size of my apartment. Do you think they have grand grocery stores like Vons, Albertson's or Ralph s  No the few stores they do have here are cramped, crowded, and stocked with maybe 1/3 of what your store carries and the food is more expensive. To live here you must accept that you are in a big city filled with small.

It’s Dark

It’ has been cloudy, rainy, hurricany, or noreasterly ever since I got here. I was walking down the street the other day and came into a patch of sunlight creeping in between buildings. I stopped right in the middle of the sidewalk and didn't move for about 2 minutes because I just wanted to feel the sun on me. I wake up and my apartment is dark. It could be 7:30 outside or 10:30; it doesn't matter because I don’t get much light in. All this throws off my sense of time and hourly progression. I swear one day it didn't get light out till near 8 am and got dark by 4:15. We had 16 hours of darkness. Daylight from October to March does NOT mean sunlight.

It’s Unpredictable

I have always said what I like about living here is you can’t be lazy. You can’t take a couple of days off and lounge around the pool here. You are challenged every day to be on your game, for survival and to thrive. I like that part but it also gets old. I must check my weather app every day; I mean I check it every day to see how I should dress. If you forget your umbrella, there is no mad dash to your car, or your work place. You Here you  are either going to get soaked or if you are lucky you can duck inside somewhere and maybe wait it out. Today it was 28 degrees, very cold. I walked 65 blocks throughout the day and despite being bundled up I was cold. Yet the forecast for a week from today is 50 degrees. If you like knowing how your day is going to be this place is not for you. The people here constantly expect the unexpected. You have to.

It’s Expensive

I don’t mean expensive like you can blow 800 bucks in a weekend in Vegas expensive, I mean every day costs are up from where I used to live in San Diego. My apartment (here) costs more than my condo did in San Diego, which I owned. A hamburger (I grant you a great hamburger) can cost 10-12 dollars and forget about the fries because that’s another 4 dollars easy. 4 people going to a nice restaurant (not the top of the line mind you) will spend 150.00 in a heart-beat. Coffee at Starbucks costs more than SD. Not a lot maybe 35 cents but it all adds up. I go do my own laundry and it’s about 6$ a load. This place costs money.

You Must Walk

When I was in San Diego, I would say to my friends, “Hey, let’s go for a walk” and we would do it for fun and some exercise. My big walking day was once a week 5 miles around Lake Miramar. Not here, you must walk. Forget walking "for fun"  because you'll walk to live. I did 7 miles today because thank God I could and because a cab would have been about 15.00. Every day I walk; there is no debating it!   Because kitchens are small you must go to the market about every 4 days and that requires one or two walking trips. Laundry requires walking; meeting for lunch requires walking, and going to a movie, museum, or getting coffee requires walking. There has not been one single day (not even Sandy) where I haven’t gone walking. Cabs are expensive, buses don’t always go where you want and even the closest downtown subway (for me) is 7 blocks away. I am fitter than I was in San Diego BUT my point is even if I just decided one day I was sick of walking, it wouldn't matter, you must walk.

The People

By and large the people here are okay. There are some panhandlers but they don’t confront you and the truth is I was more creeped out walking around downtown San Diego than NYC but here, the people are far more closed in. People are not rude on the streets but they are NOT friendly either. There is little to no eye-contact because each person is intent on just taking care of them. People have friends but they will stay within their groups. You have almost no chance of making a friend by just meeting them at a Starbucks or Panera or library etc. It’s almost (not quite) like those sci fiction movies of the future where people move about, do their jobs but have little to no interactions.  It’s a survival thing, since you are around so many people on the streets and in businesses and restaurants, the safest approach is no approach and that is the way it is.

Look, to sum up,  Central Park is beautiful, museums really nice, the subway an interesting experience, and the restaurants, plays, bars, book stores fun and so forth BUT it’s not all great. There is a price you pay to be here, and not just in dollars but by having a lot less space, light, mobility, and not much everyday friendliness. So, don’t be envious, don’t feel jealous, there are many days when it's me  missing your  friendly, smiling face, free food at Costco, Lake Miramar walks, the sun, Ralph's ice cream, In and Out Burger, and my car, my Acura. 

 It  is NYC but it’s not OZ.