"Notes From the Road"

Notes from the Road

So someone tried to break into my car in Gallup, NM. They were so dumb they saw me going into the market at the gas n stop place but didn't wait till I got inside and so when my alarm went off I turned around and looked at them and they threw up their hands and ran to their junk-filled car and lumbered off. My windows were up and doors locked so they would have had to break the glass. Dumb ass!

I stopped at a restaurant in Albuquerque called the Waffle House. How bad can a Waffle House be? When I walked in every eye turned towards me and I could see there were more tattoos in the room than waffles. It’s was a mangy, rough looking bunch of curs the likes of which I haven’t seen since that all-teacher (staff) meeting in 1990.  I was eye-balled the whole time and of course being the white bread, non-tattooed, no-greasy haired suburbanite that I am, I couldn't have stood out more. A cheeseburger to go later I breathed a sigh of relief getting on the road. The burger had more grease in it than a 68 Ford Pinto. I had 2 bites and then I threw it back into the bag and felt my arteries hardening while I drove on in search of real food.

Aunt and Uncle talked my ear off. I do love them (my favorite relatives) but they each acted like they hadn't seen a person in five years. Pictures, hobbies, truck trips to show me the latest in Farm Equipment, more pictures, stories, medical reports (I didn't want to hear). Ai Ai Yi

After three years my aunt and uncle were finally were able to get over the loss of Shorty. (Son...no, field-hand...no, friend....no, neighbor...no) a dachshund. (He really was a "shorty"). Shorty was so beloved by them that they buried him in their backyard complete with an engraved headstone and they keep fresh flowers on the grave.

Well, they got another dog: a Yorkie, rat-terrier mix. BAD idea Donna and Jerry.... a very bad idea. First of all, Yorkies are attention deficit disorder, hyperactive, yappers that pee every time the doorbell rings and Rat-Terriers are bred to be put in buildings with rats because they are so aggressive they will root around, over and under things to get to every last rat and kill them.

So "Frisky" is an attention deficit disorder, piddling, yapping, aggressive little “Hitler-Dog" He ran around biting my ankles, pissing on my shoes and on one occasion went for my crotch. Had he bitten my "frisky" it would have been the last thing their "Frisky"  would have ever done. Then there would be 2 headstones in the back yard and my aunt and uncle's flower budget would have doubled. They were smart enough (my aunt and uncle I mean) to keep Frisky away from me as best they could. I like dogs......I didn't like “Frisky”.

Later, I told Karla, my sister, that if I had wanted to be bugged by attention deficit disorder, aggressive, yappers I would have stayed in full time teaching.

 Now I am a refereeing between my squabbling sisters and their kids.

"She owed me a hundred dollars for watching their yappy, pissing dog but only paid me eighty"

"We only owed her eighty because we had to cut short our vacation because she said she was going to put “Snoozer”  out on her doorstep the next day tied to a tree” Rather than have “Snoozer” tied to a tree outside (for God’s Sake) they drove 12 hours straight.

So let me see, you don't like each other for 2 years over 20.00 and a yappy, anorexic dog named “Snoozer”. That makes sense, let's not have it be over something big like calling each other petty and dumb......noo.......lets' not do that.

I offered to pay Karla 20.00 and to kill the dog to end the feud.....she just stared at me.

I told you before; weird events gravitate toward me like BS to a politician.

Who knows what happens on my way to and in Dallas the end of this week.